Review: Deadlocked (Sookie Stackhouse Book 12)

2.5 out of 5 Stars

Genre: Paranormal Romance
Author: Charlaine Harris
Rating: 2.5 Stars out of 5
Series: Sookie Stackhouse
Blurb:
Growing up with telepathic abilities, Sookie Stackhouse realized early on there were things she’d rather not know. And now that she’s an adult, she also realizes that some things she knows about, she’d rather not see—like Eric Northman feeding off another woman. A younger one.

There’s a thing or two she’d like to say about that, but she has to keep quiet—Felipe de Castro, the Vampire King of Louisiana (and Arkansas and Nevada), is in town. It’s the worst possible time for a human body to show up in Eric’s front yard—especially the body of the woman whose blood he just drank.

Now, it’s up to Sookie and Bill, the official Area Five investigator, to solve the murder. Sookie thinks that, at least this time, the dead girl’s fate has nothing to do with her. But she is wrong. She has an enemy, one far more devious than she would ever suspect, who’s set out to make Sookie’s world come crashing down.

Sigh. I love me some Sookie Stackhouse and Eric Northman, but this bored me to tears with the first half and depressed me with the second.

Don't get me wrong, there were some interesting page turners and big plot changes that any Sookie-lover should read, but overall, I was disappointed with the direction of this book.
I don't know about you - but if my sexy vampire husband was drinking from some other chick I'd (want to) ream him a new one. Especially if it was in a bed that we, uhhh, well, ya know.

And the Sookie I love would've definitely word slapped him and THEN found out that there was something wrong, apologized, and still had some internal minor jealousy that she stops herself from acting out on.

I don't really know what happened in this book.

There were so many unfinished ideas and sub plots and blah blah that I didn't even know what was important - which turns out, nothing really was.

We had vampire royalty mixed with some of the regulars, crazy werewolf girlfriends and pack business (that of course we aren't entirely privy to), faery strippers and family members who disappeared just to reappear or are incesteous, babies are born, proposals, wedding plans, pregnancies and finally, a cameo by my favorite demon. But through all of this...there was no sex.

Zero.

Not even a make-out sesh. Come on Ms. Harris! You're killing me!

I mean, don't get me wrong, I've read (and loved) lots of books that are sex-free, but I really, and I mean REALLY would've loved to read about some steamy Eric sex to break up the absurdly slow beginning and crazy brain aneurism inducing ending...

*rant*

Also, I don't care that Sookie had two boring days in a row. Cooked, cleaned, tanned, washed hair, shaved, repeat. Because on the third day, when life isn't slow, she's complaining about how her life is constantly crazy and she needs a break from it all and blah blahhhhh - vomit. Meh.

Oh yeah, and the babies, weddings, and pregnancies? Don't care. Bored. Yawn.

*end rand*

This book received one star for completing it. Half a star for keeping me up after my bedtime (praying that something interesting was coming). Half a star for (disappointing) plot developments - if you skip this book you'll be missing some (stupid) changes. And half a star for decent editing.

*wishing with my eyes closed*

Please come back to me sexy Sookie! You helped me fall in love with so many other hot vampire loving female badasses! All I want is for you to fight for what you want and be less whiny. You just had another birthday...(wo)man up.

And PLEASE Ms. Harris - give us something sexy, fun, dangerous, and force me to stay up because I HAVE to find out what happened or who-dun-it.

*opens eyes and stares at you*

Borrow this book...don't buy it. Just wait until it's in the library or (if you are OCD and have to have it because you own all the rest - soul mates unite!) just wait for the paperback.